If straddles hurt your outer thighs, READ THIS

Posted on by Cathy Vandewater

Hey guys,

Enjoying summer?

I’ve been taking some time out to do summer stuff and generally chill in my time off, instead of spending it hunched over my computer as during the work day. So pardon my hiatus!

I did want to drop a quick line though because I haven’t stopped training (though I’m mainly doing flex, ballet barre, and poleography–no hardcore pole right now because my favorite teacher hasn’t been in in a while and I’m STILL having bad experiences with other peeps. *SIGH* Just want to get through a Level 2 without wanted to cry y’all).  Anyway, I love my other classes, and as usual when I take class with my utterly fabulous, professional, knowledgeable, infinitely patient, etc etc teachers I I LEARN SO MUCH.

Our flex teacher (WHO I LOVE, OMG YOU GUYS, SHE’S THE LITERAL BEST) asks for requests sometimes, and I recently issued a weird one: butt stretching.

Here’s the background: I have a horrific time with frog/straddle stretches. I’m used to some intense stretching, but while other people say they feel these stretching in their inner thighs, they make me feel like my outer thighs as well as hips are being broken. Like, wishbone-being-pulled-apart style.

This cannot be normal, I thought, so I googled “are straddle splits impossible for some people.” Because it feels that bad to me, and I have seen NO progress, despite making visible gains in all my other flexibility–including shoulders, aka fixing my dinosaur arms. (whaaaaat? I know! Miracles happen.)

This is a T-band stretch.
This is a T-band stretch.

What I discovered from a gazillion message boards is, sometimes the issue with painful straddles is not necessarily the muscles that straddles stretch (inner thighs) but the opposing ones: hips, outer thighs, and glutes. By targeting these muscles with stretches like figure four or T-band stretches (I don’t know the name for them but they usually involved turning your leg out and pulling it across your body), you have a better shot at getting to the muscles you actually want to stretch: yo inner thighs!

Class was mostly the typical order of operations, with straddles at the end. I don’t notice anything different, except that our figure fours and T band stretches (I admitted to the teacher when I asked for “butt stretches” that I actually didn’t know any besides these, the ones we were already doing) came right before we went into straddles.

This is also a T-band stretch.
This is also a T-band stretch.

Then a miracle happened. My straddles/froggies hurt like a bitch (lol what else is new), but for the first time ever I felt the pain in my inner thighs!!! Then we did some rolling of the hips and weight shifts and sure enough, I was able to go a little deeper. ie. I MADE PROGRESS.

I asked the teacher after class what did we had done differently (because that was MAGIC), and she said nothing–we had just changed the order. We weren’t doing any additional or different stretches, we were just doing those outer hips and glutes ones right before center splits. The teacher said she felt a difference too, and that she going to do her class like that from now on, which made me feel like less of a wackadoo for asking for “stretches for your butt” while others were requesting classy things like “heart openers.” #elegance

Figure Fo'
King of the Butt Stretches: Figure Fo’

So what’s going on with y’all? I definitely didn’t bother with the flow challenge like I thought I would because my air conditioner has just not been keeping up with this heat. When I get home I just sit on my couch and pant like Jabba the Hut, it’s pretty attractive.

I have been learning some cute combos in class though–I’ll post some poleography clips in another blog. But for now, look at this HAWT routine I saw at “Shtick a Pole in It.”

Shtick a Pole in It is a combo pole/comedy show. No, the dancers don’t tell jokes and the comedians don’t pole haha–they alternate! The comedians were surprisingly hilarious and the dancers were top freaking notch. Like, SICK.

I had two favorites performances but in one of them the dancer (terrifyingly) fell so I don’t think they’ll post it. She was fine and actually resumed the routine after a quick break to wipe the pole down, but it was really too bad because she was obviously a pro and her performance was out of this world until her fall. To her credit she was doing an insane trick combo at the time, so I guess it just goes to show that a slippery pole can strike anyone at any time.

Anyway, here’s my other favorite. My friend said she’s a NY Poler and her name is Anna. You can’t see it in the video, but she had a really lovely ease to her dancing and cute facial expressions which took an already sick routine to the next level. I’m fangirling here but I don’t even care because it was perfection.

Check her out!

And if you’re New York in September, catch the next show! I think they said it would be the last Sunday of the month, but that have yet to post. Check the Facebook group, I’m sure it will be up soon!

BeSpun just started its flow challenge again

Posted on by Cathy Vandewater

Awwww yeah, it’s that time of year again. And this time BeSpun’s Flow challenge is less about freestylin‘ and more about choreography, which I love.

Especially because it looks a lot less complicated that what I’m usually expected to learn in less than an hour of choreography classes on the pole 😐

(if only y’all knew what this was SUPPOSED to look like… and there was another minute of totally blundered choreo after this. You’re killing me Tatiana, haha).

So, Flow Challenge. Are we insies? Please share any videos with me if you participate, because I’m a nosy motherf***er and I wanna see. Here’s a link to the first installment of the challenge, and make sure you follow their facebook group to get new vids as they come out!

I learned how to make a pole dancing gif!

Posted on by Cathy Vandewater

WHEEEE

a1n3rI

I love gifs. They’re so weirdly mesmerizing.

bitch i'm fabulous

So anyway, I was messing around on my pole this weekend (hence this gif), and decided to try a handstand.

And I was like… wow, okay, that went better than expected! It was definitely hard (you can see me shaking!) but I didn’t feel as scared or as disoriented as I usually do in an upside down, free-standing movement. Progress!

Note: this may seem obvious but it was helpful to me: I just started (literally, one class under my belt) this floorwork/capoeira-inspired class, and the teacher tells us to PUSH against the ground through hand-based movements. Really helpful for handstands on or off the pole! (LOL as if I have ever done a handstand off the pole, but I’m using my imagination).

I also got yet another failed try at taking my leg warmers off without stopping a dance. Listen, I don’t care, I WILL NEVER STOP TRYING TO MAKE THIS WORK. I’m convinced it can be done, somehow, someday.

Oh and here’s a still of my shirt flying up in a handstand with a filter, because why the f*** wouldn’t I put a filter on this? Filters on everything.

handstand

Here’s a photo of  how red my thighs were afterward–without a filter because my thighs are majestic on their own and don’t need one. (Sorry that this is also a closeup of my crotch, the proximity of thighs to crotch could not be helped. I made it small so as to be less offensive).dat burn

For real though, my thighs really hurt.

How’s everybody? Anyone want to do a music swap? Here’s what I’ve been listening to. Share something!

1. Otis Redding, Stand by Me

This version has the perfect amount of lilt for pole. #Classic

2. D’Angelo, Feel Like Making Love

D’Angelo on one of my playlists? Not a surprise. I don’t mind being predictable when it comes to consistently perfect pole music tho…

3. Jah Khalib, Out of My Head

I don’t know what language this is in. Russian? Give it a chance because the hook is hot fire.

4. ScHoolBoy Q, Collard Greens

This beat is really different from everything else on my playlists.

5. J. Cole, Wet Dreamz

Love the beat/vibe on this one.

XOXOXOXO

Do this free barre workout later, maybe!

Posted on by Cathy Vandewater

So I was bingeing on Dance Mom on Hulu when I found this. Thanks Hulu! Still not going to spring for the plus, but thaaaaanks.

http://www.hulu.com/watch/388613

The commercial breaks are annoying, and you’ll have to police your own form, but I for one am definitely bookmarking this class for days when nothing’s popping at my usual studio. A lot of these moves are very similar to my barre class at B&P (which is only once a week D: ) so I’m am with it. This is that dance conditioning ish! Meaning, this is the stuff that looks easy but is actually hard because it recruits all the weird little muscles you need for extended moves and balance. Gotta love it. And I promise you’ll start seeing an improvement in your lines with this kind of training, I know I have. #believer.

Also, I think I might actually be type A and film this on my phone off of my laptop so I can cut commercials ;D

Anyway, SPEAKING OF LINES, holy shit have you guys seen this???

I’ve basically been watching it on a loop. And listening to that sooooong tho. It’s like, perfectly crafted for pole and begging for choreo.

Somebody geek out with me on this because I caaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan’t, so good.

Good dance advice: “tighten your holes!”

Posted on by Cathy Vandewater

The girls and I are prepping for a show next Sunday, so we’re rehearsing on our own (this is one third of us, haha).

Our turns are looking pretty tight (heh) which is shocking to me because I distinctly remember thinking I would NEVER get them.

It didn’t help that our teach Maki (who’s only been in the US straight from Japan for like 2 years off and on) kept yelling the same line that cracked everybody up: “TIGHTEN ALL YOUR….. HOLES!” while gesticulating around the butt area.

It’s funny because she’s very proper I don’t think she meant it to come out as vulgar as it did, but, whatever, she’s right!

To stop a turn on a dime, you have to tighten EVERYTHING… holes included. (can’t even type that without laughing, haha)

Wish us luck!

Why leg raises can kiss my pelvicly tilted ass.

Posted on by Cathy Vandewater
Fuck. This. Shit.

I just left Angela an extremely long comment (sorry Angela!) and realized I have a LOT to say about leg raises.

As you all know from my bitching and moaning on here, I’m still recovering from a mystery back issue. It got so bad that I ACTUALLY TRIED YOGA.  I still don’t know exactly what went wrong because my insurance at the time was really shitty, and when I called them to find a doctor who would accept my extremely obscure plan. They told me I had to go to the emergency room.

So I self diagnosed. (And called in sick a lot when I couldn’t stand).

I know it’s bad, but, I did my own research, and my symptoms were most in line with a herniated disk. The pain here is unique in that it’s much, much worse to be sitting that to be doing just about anything else (except maybe like, weighted dead lifts).

Gentle movement, walking, and standing all felt okay, but trying to sit at my desk for a normal work day was complete torture. On my 1.5 hour commute home I’d have to stand or risk not being able to get up from my seat when my stop came on the subway because my legs had gone numb.

This has something to do with the position your lower discs are in when you sit–they’re much more compressed than when standing. And let me tell you… I could feel it. It was like on Seinfeld when George was sitting on his huge wallet–it just felt precarious and unbalanced and generally fucked up everywhere, no matter how I shifted around in my chair. And I think, as a protective response, the muscles all around my spine tightened and spasmed and did all other kinds of general fuckery to make my life even more particularly miserable.

The red part is medical code for “this area hurts like a bitch.”

Now, I have taken a good, hard look at my life. I was in constant pain for about 6 months. My back was always seized up, I had (mistakenly!) thought I lost all my hard won flexibility because I couldn’t so much as touch my toes anymore. Inverts in pole were completely out of the question (just trying to crunch my legs up was an immediately spasm in my back), and even gentle workout classes became embarrassing and impossible as soon as something as runk twists, toe touches, or planks were involved.

I thought it would last forever, and I thought dancing was done for me.

And I wanted to know why.

Funny enough, it wasn’t until I made an almost complete recovery (gentle stretching and cardio + listening to your body FTW!) before I made the connection between a certain movement and my pain.

Leg raises.

I have an idea. Let’s not and say we did.

Fucking leg raises.

It came it be in a flash: a month or so before my pain had first started (at first in waves of back cramps that would come and go, and then in a tsunami of pain that quite literally took me off my feet), I’d started a new class at my gym.

It was called “Ab Lab.”

Great cross training for pole, right? It’s at 12pm in the gym attached to my office, and it’s only a half hour long. A quick ass kicking AND time to eat a sandwich? Sign me up.

The workout–while intense–is very old fashioned. It’s also very fast paced. And the instructor–a totally lovely guy–takes no prisoners. He will call you out. That’s my kryptonite because I have an ego when it comes to working out. So I ignored how certain things felt in order to simply complete them. Like how series after series of extended leg raises, criss-crosses, scissors, and roll ups were making my back ache and burn, not my abs.

Dat curve.
Dat curve.

Now, I’m not dumb. I have been working out and dancing for a long time. I know that to protect my back in ab exercises, I have to pull my abs in and keep my lower back glued to the floor.

Unfortunately, that’s impossible when you’re working on a double time count and flinging a medicine ball around. In fact, it didn’t even work for me at half speed. (A pilates teacher last night walked up to me and grabbed my back and was like, “wow, look at that lumbar curve.” Apparently that can cause back pain during the ab stuff because anatomy?? So I was like HOLY FUCKING SHIT, MAYBE IT’S MY BODY AND NOT MY TECHNIQUE. Because it can’t possibly be for lack of trying. I really, really try to keep my back on the floor.)

Anyway, I don’t take the ab class anymore. And I don’t give a flying fuck what kind of side eye I get during other fitness classes I take when I sit out on the leg raises.

I do not do leg raises anymore.

I just fucking do not.

Some things I can do (like lower leg scissors) if I keep my hands under my back, which helps me get into the C position where my abs do the work. But other times, if we’re doing those full body V things, I just don’t. And I apologize to the teacher or point to my back and shrug, but I DO NOT DO THEM and I don’t not let myself be bullied into doing them.

Just to reiterate:

pilates
No.

Do you have a an exercise that’s your mortal enemy?

Are leg raises amazing and I’m some kind of mutant that can’t do them?

Pls explain.

I’ve been taking a break from pole to do THIS:

Posted on by Cathy Vandewater

Y’all know I’ve been getting frustrated with pole. I feel like I’ve hit a wall–I’m bored with what I know, but I’m just not building the strength for the intermediate moves I keep encountering. Aerial inverts have been wrenching my already iffy lower back, while slipping and sliding and just trying to stay off the ground while learning stuff has just been overwhelming on top of the new skill.

Layer that with  the additional constant pressure to “know this by now” because I’ve poled for a while and you get this face:

😐

So instead, I’ve been trying to build my strength and flexibility through other means–hoping to return back to pole with some new skills and a different outlook in a bit. Right now I’m doing flex, ballet, and my long lost friend…

….HOOP!

Hoop

OMG HOOP.

Reasons I love hoop:

1. So much to hang on to. Are you kidding me? The best. You can also sit and rest between moves. Are. You. Serious.

2. Very similar moves and muscle groups as pole, but without the slipping/smashing/indian burn issues (I’ve bruised a little on the bum bum and behind the knees from the pressure but it’s really not the same as those screaming friction feels from pole).

3. I’m totally new at it so there’s no pressure to be amazing/no progress shaming

It’s also really refreshing to take a break from super sexy. I’m feeling the lyrical flow of hoop, and it’s the MOST satisfying pay off for my work in ballet and flex.

Ahhhhh, just thinking about it makes me feel relaxed and so much happier. Not that it’s not hard work–it’s just the work without all the emotional baggage that’s built up for me with pole. And it feels great!

A call for a return to normalcy in pole

Posted on by Cathy Vandewater

Read this, almost threw my computer with YASness. Like, I was so worked up in agreement that it turned into rage and then back to total agreement again. I’ll copy and past a lil teaser here but please check out the whole (fantastic, with videos) blog here: http://www.badkitty.com/news/when-pole-was-easy/

“Pole has gotten older and some would even say better. I remember thinking that Sara Cretul doing her twisted grip was the most amazing thing ever! Now we have, fonjis, flips, and flaming double-back spiral thingies. We have become a legitimate sport. Tara who? Fluffy skirts were replaced by slightly sexy but sensible outfits. Shoes were no longer the norm unless during Sexy Pole vs Athletic Pole vs Pole Art. Like a junkie I continued to chase the pole dragon and from time to time when I mastered a trick or danced in the dark by myself, I would feel a bit of the original rush. But the reality was it became harder and harder to replicate that high. Something was missing. Pole became a serious sport and I was still looking for simple. Pole was hard.”

^omg so much yes, right?

When I first got interested in pole, it was because of people like Leigh Ann. You guys already know how I feel about her. She danced, I couldn’t take my eyes off her. And actually, I remember thinking that the upside down stuff was kind of boring–I like watching her DANCE.

Now Leigh Ann is famous for her insanely acrobatic “Diamonds” video… a lot changes in seven years. But her old videos are just as popular, which I think says something about how we all feel about the new, gymnastic trend in pole dancing.

I won’t call it “easy,” but I miss a time when pole wasn’t so damn hard, and when everybody wasn’t routinely getting injured trying to wrench themselves into poses Ukrainian former-rhythmic-gymnasts-turned-polers did at the last whatever competition.

I associate pole with pain so much now that it’s something I have to build myself up to do, whereas it used to be something I used to really look forward to. I remember that one Leen Isabel cartoon that I can’t find really speaking to me in the winter months… it was a panel of a blustry, dark winter day outside, and then a sparkly, pink, happy studio inside (and maybe a unicorn?). That comic totally represented my feelings of walking into a pole studio after a long, boring, glitter-free day. Pole was magic. Pole was challenging, but in a fun way. Pole didn’t hurt that much, except in small, manageable doses that reminded your of your progress. (Somebody please link me to that comic if you can find it!!)

Am I just being being bitter, or are other people a tad nostalgic too?

Let’s face it, I’m not 110 pounds and have no background in gymnastics or ballet so I also feel like most of the “hard” pole stuff is just not gonna happen for me. So like, I’m just not all that interested in it for logistical reasons (on top of just being lazy and wanting to have fun.

What do you guys think?

How did you first feel about pole when you started out?