choreography for pole

Today in Things Everybody But Me Probably Knows About: PoleFreaks.com has routines (with breakdowns!) that you can download for free after signing up for their newsletter. This is a pretty awesome alternative to pole choreo classes that many people might not have access to. It’s super fun to work on a routine at home, if you have a pole. And most of the moves appear to be beginner level, at first glance. Get on that!

They also have workouts that cost a small amount ($3.99) which is something I might look into when my class cards run out and Christmas shopping has got me hella poor.

Sorry if this came off as an advertisement–I genuinely just found out this existed and thought it seemed like an awesome resource. The blog looks interesting too!

Anyway, I know I’m being really naughty about writing pole posts, so here’s a party favor for stopping by:

SONGS I AM CURRENTLY DESPERATE TO POLE TO:

Again, this is kinda-sorta a half ass attempt at blog hopping. I need to get on that…

1. TeeFLii feat. 2 Chainz, 24 Hours

This is sexy, but upbeat enough to keep me choosing the cute creative moves over endless hairflips and body rolls.

2. James Blake, Retrograde

I saw one of my (belly dance) teachers perform to this recently and it actually brought tears to my eyes. Understated but gorgeous song.

3. Tinashe, 2 On

Yes this is all over the radio, but it’s so. fucking. smooth.

4. Jeremih, All the Time

Another one all over the radio, and yes, it’s filthy. Sorry. This is a good rolling on the floor jam.

5. Misery, Maroon 5

Okay clearly this one is as old as the hills, but it popped up on my ipod the other day and I realized it would be for some really dynamic, story-telling choreo.

OMG and one last thing–can we talk talk about Nicki Minaj’s chair choreo at the VMAs? I know everybody was all about Beyonce, but I’m way more into the moves from the Anaconda set. She was CRISP LIKE CELERY on those tick-tocks. Love it.

Here’s the video a couple of scrolls down on Jezebel because Amtrak thinks MTV.com will be porn.

<3<3<3

Okay, so, I was learning this routine in a pole choreo class that was… to be frank, way the hell outta my comfort zone.

It was what I would categorize as modern… ish, maybe with some hip hop influences (guessing here because these are both forms of dance I have never taken classes in). The shapes were angular and purposefully a little awkward, baby-giraffe style. The movements were jerky and syncopated. There were BENT ELBOWS, you guys. That’s a serious shock to my inner belly dancer. Actually I’m hearing my teacher schreech “SOFT ELBOWS” right now. You mean, you bend your elbows on purpose? I don’t understand?

So anyway, I tried my usual tricks to make things look pretty (graceful, light arms, sweeping limbs), but, with the sharp choreography, I just looked sluggish.

At one point during class, still not looking like the instructor no matter how hard I tried, I began to channel my rage at an innocent blonde dancer who was dancing her heart out at the front of the class. She was whipping her hair around and throwing elbows and wrenching her back, and I was just overwhelmed by the need to punch her in the face.

Listen, I’m a bad person, I know.

But, right in the face. That’s real.

Anyway, I thought about the routine for a long time after class. The steps were so foreign to me (and I sucked so thoroughly at them) that I became obsessed with cracking the code. Why does that look cool and purposeful when the instructor does it, and why does it just look like a confused, hot mess on me?

I searched our song to see if someone posted our choreo (with the terms “Dark Horse,” (the song by Katy Perry) and “pole”) and here’s what I got:

Okay, so, first impression: oh yeah, that is not my class.

Second impression: MEEEEHHHHHHHHHHH.

Not to disparage the dancers–this is very well danced! This is standard pole choero too, I guess.

But… this is everything I already know. Hip pops? Hair whips? Yeah, I’m bored with this.

So that’s when the light bulb went off: I really want to do something fresh.

And that’s only going happen if I try things that feel uncomfortable.

I’m going to have to push through my resistance to learning new things. Because that’s what it comes down to, right? WHY AM I NOT INSTANTLY GOOD AT THIS, RABBLE RABBLE, I HATE IT!!!11!!!

I’ve made a point of going back to that teacher’s class, same time every. She’s got shit to teach me. I wanna learn.

Anyway, here’ s a video one of our classmates took (on the night I cried on the way to class btw, SO META) of a new routine, (post “Dark Horse.”) It’s ROUGH and a little awkward looking, but, hey, it’s a Brand New Style, mang! I’m digging it.